Pieces of Roman Ruins just waiting for someone to come along and piece them together. Oh, and probably some $$$ to enable them to do so.
When we went to the Grand Canyon in March, the entrance fee to get into the park was $100 for our family of four. When we visited the ancient Roman ruins at Jarash here in Jordan, the entrance fees were about $5. I don't need to tell you what a difference in services you get for $100 versus $5. The Grand Canyon gave us maps and offered us guided tours. At Jarash we had to pay extra to get toilet paper.
Lucky for us, one of my neighbors came with us and she had the foresight to print off maps and bring along a tour book. Without these, we would've had nada.
Enter the hussle.
I must say, rarely do we have someone come up to us and beg for money without something to sell or some service they will perform. In fact, the only woman I know of who begs regularly sits right in front of the ATM machine around the corner from our flat. Kinda hard to pretend you have no $$ when she just witnessed you pulling out a bunch, no?
So there we were on our self-guided tour of the ruins when we were approached. Do we want the whole family's picture? Just give me the camera. Have you heard the rock that sings? Come with me and I'll show you. Did you know the columns sway in the wind? Come with me I'll show you.
Crap. How did we get stuck with this guy?
Other hearts in my group were bigger than mine. Along we went to see the column sway and to hear the rocks sing. He wanted to perform a service, he wasn't begging. Was any of what he told us true? How would we know the difference? A couple of Jordanian Dinars later, he was off to see who else needed his assistance.
Sigh. Why is he coming back?
Apparently, he approached another couple. When he asked the woman if this were her husband, she replied, "No, this is my ???? (some word I don't know or recall)" He didn't understand what this word meant. We replied we didn't know either. He stated, "I know how to speak English" with a great deal of pride. We agreed he spoke English very well and told him we had no idea what the word was.
The look on his face.
I know that he is used to people being unkind. Get a job. But this woman made him feel stupid. And I remembered. Dignity. He wasn't trying to get something for nothing. In fact, in America, we'd call this "enterprising" ~ performing a service where none was provided. I need to remember that the next time I want to think of it as "annoying" and I hope I always treat people in a way that leaves their dignity in tact.
9 comments:
SO TRUE!
I was in a nice restaurant a few days back when one of the patrons starting berating the waiter for bringing too many glasses of water. I wanted to sink into the floor from embarrassment. Is it really so hard to treat people the way you want to be treated?
That's so true. A good lesson.
Hey, did that rock really sing???
At first (being an idiot) I thought you had dinner with him. It only took me a second to realize you gave him some money (dinars). I'm glad you did, you took the time to listen. That was nice.
So true! And I have to admit - sometimes it is annoying, but that doesn't mean they don't deserve to be treated with respect. I sure have a lot of respect for people that are getting out there and trying to do something enterprising.
breaks my heart every time i see a beggar. in this country, more than any other i've lived, i get to see the repercussions of faraway policies.
painful.
so hard to feel annoyed with people who didn't put themselves in that position in the first place, you know?
I had to explain begging to my 5 year old today. She didn't understand why these women keep coming up to our car window and pantomiming putting their hands to their mouths.
She asked why these people didn't have money... and didn't understand that you can't just go to an ATM and get money out if you don't have any there.
It's hard to explain begging to a child. It is even HARDER to explain how a poor woman, or worse, a desperate looking child, is begging because someone is using them to beg and will later take this money. I've seen too many of these evil 'pimps', including some actually hitting children to make them cry. I never give to any beggar for this reason. Charities only. I also tip well, overtip even, remember my pleases and thank yous, and do unto others, etc. There's enough evil in the world.. why should I add to it with pompous behavior? Nope. Besides, when you are very nice to people, they tend to be very nice to you.
Great post and so true. I would feel better about giving money to someone who wants to work and help in some way vs. the woman who just sits at the ATM expecting to get something for nothing. Either way, they both still deserve a polite answer. Great insight.
What a neat little adventure though! I do get irritated with all of the gypsies here in town when they sit & beg... but when they do something I always give them something....
Hey, this guy (or likely his older brother) showed us around Jerash about 12 years ago! It is interesting to see the folks who will beg vs those who want to do something for money. There are the girls at Safeway who beg and the ladies with babies who stand in the summer heat at the stop light to make you feel bad. But, most people have gum or other things to sell. Shame on that woman for making him feel ignorant. I'm afraid I might have gone and given her a piece of my mind!
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